Be Present

I once heard a sermon that encouraged the congregation to allow enough space in our everyday schedules so when opportunity to bless others was before us we would recognize it or even (gasp!) welcome it. As I progress in my life with wonderful children I think back to that sermon with a  bit of 1. Yep, sure. You don’t stay at home with your kids, work a job, clean the house, make the meals, etc. 2. I barely have time for myself let alone someone else not under my stead.

But as I continue to try to view the world again as a small child does, through the lenses of my children’s eyes, I see how important this sermon really is.

It wasn’t (I hope) that the speaker was trying to challenge me with the impossible, but rather to make the impossible, possible. With children I think we all hope to be a good example to them in all we do: cleaning, cooking, working, and even our relationships. I think even more so is being present in all that we do. Will I fail at this, darn toot’n, did just today. Will I continue to strive to Be Present, you betcha.

Because the importance of being present is not to add another thing to my ever growing list of responsibilities but rather to bring meaning and depth to them.

For example: I hate the dentist. Be it a cleaning, tooth pulling, filling, or brackets being glued to my teeth, I very much dislike the dentist. I very much dislike the waiting (even if I am on time, they rarely are). I very much dislike getting a babysitter for something that is necessary but not at all instantly rewarding. It’s an investment…I hope. Anyways, so I was at the dentist recently and the usual waiting happened and my usual fowl mood began. But then I had that thought, “Be Present.”

“Ok, I said, let’s do this right.” Rather than sulking in that dentist chair that I (finally) was put into and counting the minutes, I decided to talk to the technician like a real person rather than as just the x-ray technician. I determined to Be Present.

Wow did her demeanor change! I learned that she speaks fluent Romanian and some Russian. That she hopes to have kids and teach them the languages and hopes she doesn’t forget them herself before then. She was smiling and my x-rays were over before I knew it. The cleaning, not nearly as bad as I usually think it to be (no cavities either!). The dentist did ask if I was a “clencher” and I told him, “Well yes sir, I nursed.” He was confused. The dental hygienist (mother of four) laughed out loud. I was present…maybe a little too present.

But I tell you what. Before I could even get my tail to the grocery store I was already counting the minutes of how long I had and would be gone. If my dear friend might think I was taking too long to get back… But then I took a deep breath and said, “Be Present.” And darn if God decided to challenge me. I was nearly to the check-out line and had one item left to get and I had to ask an employee where it was.

That employee, for whatever reason, asked about the contents of my cart:

“You must be making chili”
“Um. No Ma’am, New Orleans Beans…a newer recipe to my family…”
“Oh? Tell me about it.”
(pause)
“Sure!” I said.

I then proceeded to make this lady’s day by being present. I took that additional ten minutes to give her a new recipe. To a lady that doesn’t have a computer or an e-mail address I even blessed her old-school by writing it with (gasp!) a pen and paper (yes, it was on the back of a sushi take out order or a church bulletin of some sort). But this lady, who I previously judged as a grump, widened her employee smile into something sincere and appreciative. I had looked at her as a person in the moment that was no longer my own. I had made room for the impossible to be possible. I was present for someone else; even beyond my own family.

As Abraham Lincoln said, “The best thing about the future is that it comes only one day at a time.”

One present day at a time. Even if it hurts a little. Even if its exhausting.

“There is one thing we can do, and the happiest people are those who can do it to the limit of their ability.  We can be completely present.   We can be all here.  We can give all our attention to the opportunity before us.” – Mark Van Doren, American author, poet, and teacher.

Here’s to your best, and worst, efforts to Be Present. Cheers!